FedEx Officially Sucks

So this happened again. I bought stuff online, and I wanted it quick. The only delivery option was with FedEx. A week later, I got worried and tracked the package. There it was, supposedly delivered twice, total bullshit. Sure I wasn't home! But there was no tag on the door whatsoever. So I couldn't leave a note to the delivery person, nor did I know this was already the time to start calling the bastards.

You see, this is the fourth time I am "getting" stuff with FedEx in the past three years of so, in fact to two different addresses. Each time the same story happens. After a while, a ghost courier appears at my door and makes a note of attempted delivery, but "forgets" to slap on the sticker. Nobody gets to see the event, just the online notification. Mind you, they don't send any emails, you have to remember to go check it yourself. If I am too late, I have to go to this place in the far suburbs. If I catch it early enough, I can be spared the two hour trip. I call their helpline and talk to some Indian half a globe away. These folks have absolutely no clue how the whole system works, and will never release you your local station's phone numbers. If you are good at explaining, they will tell you some address and let you go pick your package. This last time, after a while of telling same old story, I was asked the door tag number. They just don't get it.

In fact, I had never had this sort of trouble with any other carrier, be it UPS or the Postal Service. Neither did I have trouble when ordering with FedEx to my work. So the only conclusion I can make is they are cheating, simply letting simple folks down and paying attention to large customers. These assholes should call themselves Little-Joe-Can-Pick-His-Shit-Himself, not a delivery service. So from now on it is my complete boycott of FedEx, whenever possible.

This just in:
FedEx drivers pass their worktime smoking dope under bridges.